The Right Kind of Anger
WarriorWoman - All rights reserved to the photographer
“Anger is only a natural reaction; one of the mind’s ways of reacting to things that it percieves to be wrong. While anger can sometimes lead people to do shocking things,it can also be an instinct to show people that something isn’t right.” – Anonymous
Anger as an instinct. I like that. That’s why I think whoever came up with the phrase ‘It’s not personal,’ should be shot and buried in an umarked grave! Just kidding. On a serious note though, ‘it’s not personal,’ my foot! This phrase has been(and continues to be) the not-so-subtle back alley escape route for the most cowardice and malicious injustices committed against humanity. Let’s take a seemingly mundane example. You are driving to work on a Friday morning, some reckless inconsiderate person slams your rear and breaks your tail lights. Consequently, they waste one hour denying their mistake, until the police come and waste yet another hour and a half sorting the mess. Two and a half hours of your life that you will never get back!
You get to work, your boss yells at you and you are humiliated infront of your workmates. You reliability is questioned. You’re running behind schedule now with your work, you cancel the date you have been looking forward to all week because you have to work late. Your love life takes a back seat, again! To make matters worse, you now have to work the over weekend to clear the back log inorder to be back in favour with the boss. And what did the other driver say to you as you walked out of the police station cursing? “Girl, relax! It’s NOT Personal.”
Here’s the truth of the matter though, in my opinion, everything is personal. All of it. If it wasn’t personal, then global politics would not be ruffling under our skirts to base its agenda on our genitalia; who is female, who is male. Their propaganda would not be based on our skin, who is dark, who isn’t. They would not go prying into your bank account to find out if you are ‘worth’ their time and their prisy judicial system. It’s that personal! So much so that current technologies, which in turn impact on the economy, are now basing their success on how much they can embed themselves in us, both our psyche and in the physical sense. We are changing who we are and allowing them to change us. We are not humans anymore, now we are cyborgs. By becoming thus we continue to fortify the ‘great’ consummer capitalist empire, which is another subject in itself to be explored later.
You see the problem with the statement, “it’s not personal,” is that it downplays the most important part of our emotional well-being. Our Anger. It denies you of that crucial part of self-expression by making you believe that you should stifle any such feelings. Why? Because letting your anger known means, somehow (in this twisted world) that you are standing in the way of progress. It mean that you are inhibiting the forward motion and you’re these folks who just “can’t let it slide.” Your anger is ridiculed as a demostration of closed-mindedness and if only you learn to put a lid on it, then you can be part of society with your ‘open-mindedness’. You become exactly what the world needs. Carbon copies of clowns with painted smiles across there faces, never showing displeasure, because your displeasure makes people uncomfortable. And people do not want to be uncomfortable now do they?
As a matter of fact, this statement is used to normalise, tribal, racial, gender and class injustices that are hurled at us in our everyday lives. Whenever someone plays the race card, they hide behind the phrase ‘it’s not personal. Whenever you miss a job opportunity you deserve because you possess beautifully conspicuous mammary glands-it’s not personal. Or the price of unga shoots up and fuel at its all time high renders you broke all year long, – It’s not personal, it’s the economy.
And right there, the only thing you had left in you, your fight, has been thwarted into a broken submission. You have been admonished and shamed for even thinking that you are entitled to be angry. Your anger has been labelled archaic and a hopeless acceptance offered as the only way ‘forward’. They are saying well,’ just accept it and move on.’ Did the bully of a politician steal millions of funds and leave his constituents starving to death? Did the wealthy neighbour illegally encroach on your already feeble piece of land? Did you get unjustly evicted and your rent deposit denied to you? Did I lie to your face and break your heart without so much as a blink? Well then, deal with it. It’s not personal, It’s just the way things are.
I used to wear my anger around my neck like a yoke. Hanging my head in shame for possesing such rage inside of me. I would walk around making apologies for it, highlighting it as my stubborn flaw. Until I realised what a simple treasure it is. My passions and convictions expressed in a LOUD explosive way. That’s my anger. I embraced it. And why shouldn’t I? My realisation opened up a world of reasonable causes for which I should be angry and so should you.
Because anger fuels us and moves us to do things. Please understand the kind of anger I am referring to here, I am not in any way advocating for the sociopaths that can’t wait to maim,kill and destroy in the name of anger. No, I am speaking for those of us who have been letting our anger simmer inside of us when some inconsiderates flaunt their injustices and unfair actions. Get angry! Let it be known. Because anger ignites a fire in us that melts down that forced submission and propells our attitudes to want for change. Our attitudes then transform us to BE the change that we need. Our anger restores our pride and our pride is what keeps us grounded. And don’t you forget it!
So next time someone says to you, “it’s not personal,” knock them unconscious, tie them to a pole and then dump them in the indian ocean, along with the one who said “It’s never that serious!”. Just kidding. Look them in the eye and let them see your anger and you say to them “You bet it is!”
© Sally Kahiu 2011
Another of my furry little friends
One day i’ll write about what a great thinker you are, how i love your mind. One day.
I get where you are coming from & yes in most cases it is personal & ,like you said, the right kind of anger should be expressed. You should also recognize that is some cases that it is not personal & the right kind of humour is needed then
.
Thanks James
I love the way you think too. Cannot imagine not having you as a sister challenging me to greater thinking. You are a blessing
Awww sweety you’re a blessing too. Thank you, thank you, thank you.